Skip to main content

ASSUMPTIONS - The art of judging people....



There are few things that we are taught at school, college, work or at life in general. But this is something everyone seems to be a master at irrespective of age, qualification or even experience. I sometimes wonder, if we were to adhere to all those stories about morals and values taught at school would we end up being a perfect human being, or since there is nothing or no one as perfect; at least near to perfect? I guess that is definitely debatable. One such thing which we were taught at school and were assuming that we never knew what it actually meant is to 'never judge a book by its cover...' Apparently even before we realize it, we are into it - judging. And everyone seems to be an expert at it. 

So, when I was first taught this, all I did was go through all kinds of books to check with their covers for sizzling titles matching the image and the tag lines. Though I am not an avid reader, I have the habit of judging a book by its cover which fails to leave me alone. Apparently, this art of judging has not limited itself to books alone, instead has spread across to people, situations and solutions too. So much so that the essence of 'judging a book by its cover...' is lost during transition. It was at a time one of my favorite pass time. Any day, it was always easier to assume that the girl next door is silently having an affair with the guy across the street corner. On a pool drive in the cab, it was easy to assume that if your co passenger of the other gender takes up a seat next to you despite the shotgun being available, then he / she is either mannerless or desperate. It was easier to assume that since they spend most of the time sticking next to each other, there is some or the other scene going on between them. It was easier to assume that being a single / divorced / widowed working woman can bring its own perks and advantages. 

And all this while it was evident that whatever was being assumed was totally true, not because there cannot be a better version of it but merely because it was being done by someone who has been an expert at it with a record of very few instances going different than as assumed. To think of it, let us assume for a minute that all of these assumptions have been right, what is it that has or could have been done about it. NOTHING. Nothing worth the effort put in assuming it at the first place. Nothing that can improve the productivity factor at work or even your personal life as a matter of fact. But, what if all that we have been assuming all this while is just a pop up of your own mundane life? What if this is just an outcome of your own whimsical way to life? What if it is not a mere assumption but a nightmare for someone?

It does not always have to be about people assuming someone is free and available just because of her type of clothing, or about people thinking someone is desperate just because she is there at the wrong place at the wrong time of the day, or about people concluding that if she is a working professional there might have been sleep overs to the top. Such assumptions can be harmful at times. But is there a category of harmless assumptions?Something about things like a child who has not been eating right. We tend to assume he / she is being naughty. A child who has not been listening to his / her parent. We tend to assume that the child is acting too smart for his / her age. Turns out to be true in most of the cases, after all Moms know the best, don't they? But what in those cases where the assumption does not hold true? Rule it out as collateral damage. It's sad that we are never trained to leave our assumptions behind.

So I was just thinking if all those who are experts at judging others, give it a thought before jumping to conclusions based on baseless assumptions about someone, this world might definitely turn up to be a better place to be. It is not going to be easy - to stop every time we begin to assume and ask what the matter is, to let go of the assumption and accept the fact, to embrace life with conviction and not with assumptions. At the end you will be left either with a baggage filled of assumptions or a bundle of life. 

"MOST OF OUR ASSUMPTIONS HAVE OUTLIVED THEIR USELESSNESS."
        
                                                                                                             Marshall McLuhan


Dedicated to MAO....

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A Religion called TECHNOLOGY

How many of us understand our religion let alone following it religiously? None. Now that was way too easy. Most of us actually get irritated on the name of religion, yes, you read it right. IRRITATED. Might be because it's so complicated to understand and more so to follow. Yet, there's a strange thing which I have noticed. A special religion which we keep following while we study, play, work, dine, gossip and even when we need to communicate to one another. A religion which we follow sub consciously all through the day and can't do without. A religion, called TECHNOLOGY .  A religion is a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, especially when considered as the creation of a supernatural agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs - Wikipedia says it.   We don't wake up to the tinkling of our Mom's Bangles, we don't g...

7 TIPS TO MAKE JOURNALING A DAILY HABIT

Habits make us what we are. True that. Many of us are familiar and are probably experts at writing a Diary. In fact any one who has ever tried maintaining a diary at some point of our lives are all potential writers according to me. A diary is the only place where we can put out our thoughts without deliberation, where we can shout out loud about our inhibitions, where we can mention our fantasies without hesitation. I have too many lovely memories of writing a diary. My day would start and end with it. And one thing that would always find place in it on any given day was my love for Prem. Had to stop the habit as it turned out that people in my family got suspicious that I would someday elope with a guy named Salman Khan. I know, you must be having a laugh at it, but back then it was a little serious, not to forget that I was just 15 then. I never got back to that habit again. Yet, he remains my eternal heart throb till date.  Thanks to the advent of technology and our friendly so...

भोलू का सपना

एक दिन ऐसे ही जब भोलू की आँख खुली  तो उसे लगा जैसे उसने कोई सपना देखा  उसने कोई सपना देखा सपने में अपनी माँ को देखा  माँ बोली जल्दी से उठ जा भोलू सूरज सर पर हैं  नहा धो कर तैयार होकर पढ़ना भी तो है  पढ़ना भी तो है फिर मित्रों संग खेलना भी है  भोलू चौक कर माँ से बोला पढ़ेंगे कैसे हम  विद्यालय तो  बंद है और न कोई अध्यापक है  और न कोई अध्यापक है तो उठ के क्या करू  इस पर माँ हंस के बोली मेरा हाथ बंटाएगा  धुले कपडे सुखाएगा तो गणित की गिनती सीखेगा गणित की गिनती सीखेगा और जल्दी बड़ा होजायेगा  भोलू ने फिर अचरज में माँ से पुछा खेलूंगा कैसे  मेरे मित्र तो अपने अपने घर पर है कोई नहीं बाहर  कोई नहीं बाहर तो किसके संग खेलूंगा मैं  इस पर फिर माँ हंस के बोली चल नए मित्र बनाये  आसमान के साथ पतंग उड़ाए और नदी के संग तैरें  और नदी के संग तैरें फिर थक के घर लौट आये भोलू की आँख खुली तो देखा माँ कपडे धो रही थी  दौड़ के गया और उसने माँ को अपना सपना सुनाया  माँ को अपना सपना सुनाया तो माँ हंस के बोली  अब उठ ही गय...